The days on the long road of one families Ethiopian Adoption

This blog started out as a way to record the twists, turns, highs and lows in my families journey to adopt siblings from Ethiopia. Now our children are home and we have just finished celebrating our first year as a family.

I'm Kimberly (or Fendesha), an adventurous person who aspires to be a vagabond- but for now- I spend all of my free time travelling and my down time thinking of travelling. I'm a mom of 3 (the oldest being my gorgeous canine companion), a IT project manager, and on occasion I find myself the primary writer of this blog.

Happy Reading and thank you for stopping by.

Monday, September 29, 2008

Dreaded Adoption update, the dog house turns to Kid house, and New England Fall time

It's been an adventurous and busy couple of weeks:

Adoption update:
As you know we changed our request from siblings- 1 child under 12 months and one under 2 to siblings 1 under 2 and 1 under 4 or twins under 4. After spending some time there and getting to interact with the children more we felt more comfortable with the developmental stages children who were slightly older were at- and perhaps we'd like to hurry our referral a bit more. Quite frankly- It's taking way to "fraken long" I'm tired of waiting waiting waiting and waiting.. oh and did I say waiting. Laugh. I still feel shallow saying it- but I want a referral- like yesterday.

We talked with our agency and they told us to expect a referral by spring. I was crushed (can you hear the sound of the bricks falling???)

On the homefront-

Denis keeps joking that the longer the referral takes the more "square footage" of our home is being dedicated to them. Our home which is currently one giant dog house for our beloved Geneva is turning into a playhouse for our "imaginary" children. You know how creepy we must look to the people that don't know we are adopting that visit our home?? We are two childless people with a playroom that has an active lego table on it, trains going around the ceiling of it and on another floor with a smaller play room that is decorated and contains a costume rack and a playset in the back yard with swings, the rock wall and a slide? My god... It's beginning to become a bit "embarrasing" could you say. Although we had the greatest compliment the other day when our friends walked into the playroom and said to us- geesh guys this looks like a daycare-laugh!!!!

A little more on the new costume closet with magnetic walls and soon a small book shelf. We have a costume closet now under the stairs of the family room and it's full of costumes- (you see my brother in law loves Marshalls so when he's visiting we go to many- this time being that halloween is right around the corner- I couldn't help myself and I bought costumes at each of them). There's a giraffe, lion, frog, turtle dragon, elephant.. to name a few ... I find myself wishing they were in Adult sizes - Denis would have had a blast in the Chicken outfit-and I've been tempted several times to put on the horse outfit. The kids that visited last week liked the turtle and the horse (clip clop clip clop -neeehhhh).

Our neighbor just finished helping us build a Lego table for the play room - (did you know Lego was a Connecticut company)? I purchased a table from the mill stores and he cut a square out of the middle of the table and drilled a hole in the removed piece. We affixed a canvas bag to space where the hole is and then added polyurethane to the table. It looks awesome! Denis and I have enjoyed plenty of hours of imaginary play over the past couple of weeks.

We just finished watching the last few episodes of Battlestar Galactica and Lost so we are finally caught up and can read the websites. OMG-I can't believe how BG ended!!! I can't wait to find out who that last Silon is... Starbuck, Apollo, or the obvious.. Baltar (ugh). And now they are one big happy family Silon and Humans??? What's up with the XO.. wow...weee...

And with Lost- they are so busy killing each other that it's not surprising only 6 escape. I have to say though- I enjoyed season 4 almost as much as season 1 and I'm glad I stuck with it. Sayid- "Naveen Andrews" is sooo HOT. It's no wonder People magazine rated him "one of the worlds most beautiful people". Somebody has finally trumped "Dylan McDermott" on my number one spot of "people to be stranded along on an Island with". "That's a little running conversation that my buddy I run with and I have started up"...

this year I've discovered what a commitment TV can really be- now that shows are available online I'm thrilled- it's exhausting to try to keep up with this stuff. Denis has started watching the Hero season and I'm going to start watching Prison Break (PB is HUGE in Ethiopia and everyone was talking about it while I was there so I have to watch it-laugh).

When my brother in law left last week from his couple long week visit with us - we met our new social worker -she's awesome (as our old one recently quit) and then I went to Maine to visit with my mom.

My mom lives in South central western Maine (Jay to be specific). This is the area I grew up in- now when I visit the area seems so depressed. It doesn't seem like the vibrant town where people were always busy and homes were being built and school and community activities were hopping (I grew up in Turner). The area seems sad to me- my childhood memories seem so far away. The factories are closing along with the few mom and pop stores that were there, the mall in Auburn is empty of stores, the Big Walmart's have moved in along with the commercial oil companies and chain convenience stores and the people seem to be getting heavier and heavier. The farms are turning to modular home lots (although smaller than I've been seeing elsewhere) and the old barns are colapsing from the past couple of bad winters. For sale signs are EVERYWHERE... What happen to the somewhat green Maine with farms and active people??? I grew up recycling, riding my bike, getting veggies from my uncle's farm for dinner and taking care of the horses.

It's amazing actually-because what I see now is the "adult perspective" as a kid- the ski lodges are still active, the schools still have their sports and drama, you can still swim in the lakes and go ice skating in the winter and heck- they now can have food delivered to their doors, all of the roads are tar, and they have their own private phone lines- did anyone else grow up with a party line-it was great for calling your neighbors (and listening into their lives-ha ha) ???

Delivery for pizza- now that was an awesome discovery when we moved away from Turner. Food directly to your door!!!WOW!! It's amazing how when you are not close to home you remember your home location as dreamy but as you get older and more distant from it- those memories create a kind of space time experience in your head that doesn't allow the place to change...laugh.

Well- off to Maine again this weekend. Even though Jay has changed the State itself is still my "home". And childhood memories still dance in my head in the fall. The trees are starting to change and it's GORGEOUS. I can't wait to hear the crunching of leaves under my feet with the dog running along in the woods off her leash. It's time to climb up an apple tree and pick off those last few macs, start thinking about baking and buying the foods from the farm stands to do so during the week after work, and of course-one must fling rocks into the lakes for people to stub their toes on in the summer to come-failing to skip them across the water that is still foggy in the morning and now too cold to swim in. The absence of the birds in the forest as the loons and birds are flying to their winter resorts. (ohh and let's not forget to put on those bright yellow coats that you never see the handsome dad's wearing in the LLBean catalogs so the hunters won't shoot you and your dog!). It's really the best time of year- with the colors surrounding you, last years sweaters freshly out of the closet and the smell of wood fires in the evenings... There's no place like New England in October.. and I can't wait.

County Fairs:
Went to the Big E this weekend. It's a must do once, if you love fairs -but my list for favorite fall fairs remains unchanged:
Blue Ribbon to Blue Hill Fair, Red Ribbon to Fryeburg fair and Yellow Ribbon to Topsfield Fair. But topsfield comes with it's warning label- you must go early in the morning toward the beginning or middle of the fair. It's way too crowded otherwise. The Topsfield lacks animals but makes up for it in Horticulture. The Big E.. well it just kind of Lacks-but if you're into the rides-they have a huge Midway and it's really a very very big fair. If you're pushing a stroller it's probably pretty good because it's all tar too.

Completely Selfish plug.

My Birthday is This Thursday so of course- the beginning of October is truly perfect time- it's also an awesome time for one to officially "age". Although to most our friends and family - I'm thrilled that I'll always be the young and springy chicken!! He He (the benefits of surrounding yourself with those older than you).

OOOOHH.. Dear Wonderful Hubby got me a ticket to see Madonna with one of my Neighbors on the 16th. I CAN'T WAIT!!!.... oh gooody gooody gooooody!!!!

Have a great week and I'll post again then. Perhaps I'll even post some new pictures-laugh.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Articles of Incorporation and Bylaws- PHEW

It's just about real!!! Hayle Education Fund for Ethiopian Children Incorporated is almost a legitimate company (in the state of Massachusetts only pout pout)- can you believe it?

After a couple of months of research,etc.. I'm now selecting my board of directors and am going to submit the paperwork to the state. Hip Hip Horray. Hopefully it will receive the stamp of approval with little hick-ups and I'll be moving onto stage 2- the EIN the IRS 1023 paper-chase. But I can create a website and start collecting some funds when step one is completed!!!

But since I need to celebrate the babysteps-boy did the adoption process teach me that one.. This is my little celebration-thanks for joining in...laugh. Now I'm off to complete stage 1 this week and then I get to "sit and wait" for approval. After "approval" I can move onto stage 2.

Cross your fingers and thanks for the help to all of you who have provided ideas and guidance along the way (an extra special reach out to!!!

Thanks a bunch!!

Thursday, September 11, 2008

15 months waiting and "Three Cups of Tea"

So- here we are- waiting waiting waiting...oh and have I said "waiting" to start our family. I was prepared for 12 months- even 14 months. Granted- we put it "on hold" thinking we'd be right on top when I returned from Ethiopia and now that we are fully engaged again with our new fingerprints, and updated home study- etc.. I find it incredibly irritating that we are still at minimum "3rd" in line with really no end in sight. We were only 5th (guessing of course) when I left in March.

Granted- I should be saying "thank god" that we didn't focus on the adoption during the time period I/We were in Ethiopia- because at that time we desperately needed a break from it all. Now (from my perspective of March 2006 when we started all of this)- it's reached emotionally "ridiculous" and we find little pleasure in even talking about the adoption. In fact- we really enjoy talking about "other people's adoptions" giggle. We've been really privileged to see new families grow- and I'm so excited as this truly is the best part of "waiting".
I can't help but whine today though-damn I'm usually so good about this stuff.. Where's my cheese?? Ha Ha.. Although-"this line of folks waiting" - seems to be an awesome problem for Ethiopia to have-it's not making me feel any better about the length of time we're going to have to wait.

Okay- enough on that soapbox.. have you seen the following announcement???
This is where I will be tomorrow- come join me.

I'm so excited by Mortenson's adventures and inner strength- and to actually see him speak will be a complete personal thrill... Come join me!!!

Mortenson to Speak at Stonehill in September

Mortenson will visit Stonehill College on Friday, September 12 and speak at 4:00 p.m. at the Sally Blair Ames Sports Complex.

If you have not read "3 cups of tea" yet... please do. It's a great book!


Thanks for tuning in- but now I have to hurry back to the "waiting phase" of this adoption... :-)

Hugs to you all and good night!

The Waiting, Waiting, Waiting-oh and Still Waiting...Calderones

Wednesday, September 10, 2008


(a note from my host sister in Ethiopia)....

Happy Ethiopian New Year to you all- love Kim, Denis and Geneva
As the Ethiopian tradition during "Addis Amet" or New Year, early in the morning everybody goes to Church wearing traditional clothing. After Church there is a family meal of "Injera" and "Doro Wat". The girls go from house to house singing New Year songs and the boys sell pictures that they have drawn. In most places, in the evening families go to visit their friends and drink "tella". Really I'm not seducing you.

As you know, Enkutatash means the "gift of jewels". When the famous Queen of Sheba returned from her expensive trip to visit King Solomon in Jerusalem, her chiefs welcomed her bolts by replenishing her treasury with inku or jewels. Today's Enkutatash is the season for exchanging formal new year greetings and cards among families and friends.

But know I'm not giving you card, no sweet flower to send, no gift of jewels to give. Just a sweet words saying have a nice Enkutatash. "Enkuan aderesesh"Happy New Year!!!!

Monday, September 8, 2008

I think my husband is nesting..Giggle

Our Sixth anniversary brought about an exciting change in my Denis dearest..

Denis took the day off and we were going to go visit a museum- have a nice lunch- perhaps a nice long walk in the woods with our Geneva- but instead- our 6th anniversary was a "TACKY" one...

The basement project we started the weekend before took much longer than we thought it would. It was a ton of work but actually quite rewarding.

We borrowed "Uncle J's" table saw and went to work cutting out a puzzle into cork-literally- it took forever. We spent until 5am the first night working on it and continued on Tuesday night and then Denis took Wednesday off from work so we could do something "romantic or fun" as noted above and what did we do exactly??? We laid down cork flooring. UGHGHGHG.. Laugh. Yes everyone my yellow page husband did a home project with me. I was so proud-laugh!!! It looks great - for 2 neophytes!!

Following this he has been mysteriously "empowered" by his new home talents (he can cut wood- hurray!!!)- so he's proceeded to reconfigure the cabinets upstairs so that my pots and pans will fit better in our otherwise "cabinet less" Kitchen (on the bottom we have one plus the breakfast bar-literally)-laugh.

It seems he's decided to "rediscover" the garage as well. Yesterday he went to lowes (with our Geneva-the ST. Bernard in the back seat of the bug convertible) and they came home with long shelves sticking out the back of it - which apparently he is going to hang from the ceiling. He's going to "organize" all of the items that came out of the newly finished side of the basement. "We have extra siding, and a few things like that --that we can't throw out.."

I haven't blogged for a bit- Here's why:

Besides finishing the cork flooring in the basement-
  • We've built a fire-pit in the back yard
  • Cleaned out and organized most of the closets
  • We've painted the inside of a closet with magnetic paint which we are going to utilize as a small storage/play space in the new basement for the kiddos
Could it be that my husband dearest is Nesting???? Giggle!!

Meme Stevens- Beautiful Song- get Kleenex

Oh the places I've Been (and might go again)